I related my up and down experiences in the past few days to my therapist. He couldn't provide any answer. My 17 years old self appeared aggressively while I was jogging trying to calm myself this morning. I started the conversation with him to calm his anger during the jog and I related this to my therapist as well. My therapist did a session helping me to reduce the anger of 17 years old self in me too. He was also exploring quite a bit on my will of patching back with my ex. After all the test, he concluded that I should sever the soul tie with my ex and set him free then and there. He taught me a method of severing the soul tie with my ex and setting him free. I did it again and again, not knowing if this would work in my subconsciousness. With the reassurance exercise, the therapist ended the session. He wanted me to reassure myself I was strong and independent enough to stand on my two feet to face and solve problem.
Went back to office to settle the piling work with much anxiety within me. After work I asked J out for dinner but not much interaction between. I bought a book titled "Happier" by Tal Ben-Shahar. It was the course taught in Harvard Business School. I was asked to read more of this kind of book to self-help healing. H texted to say that he was running high fever. I called him to check how he was and urged him to go doctor. He obviously had overworked himself a bit.
Come back home now feeling a bit calmer or not much feeling. I guess I am initiating my discipline to suppress any form of negative feeling. Not sure if this is good or bad, but I am strong and life is going on.
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