Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Learn to be reserved in words

After jogging in East Coast, Mel, Dan and I went to Whampoa food centre for dinner. We met Ja and his bf. During the chat I related a recent event between Ed and An. An likes to exaggerate things when he talks about people. An was again exaggerated a recent event related to Ed and Mel in a gathering to a group of friends. Knowing An's habit, I confirmed with Mel later that the event was again largely been exaggerated and unfair to Ed. I told them that I have ever discussed this habit with An a few months back. The answer I got from him was quite amazing. An feels that his behaviour is normal and necessary in our circle as everyone talks about everyone everywhere. Therefore, he feels that it is totally right for him to talk about people the way he likes as he assumes people will also talk about him freely behind his back. I surrendered myself after two hours of preaching to him at that time and in return I got a nick name of preacher from the group after An related my lecture to him to them.

We then followed to discuss there should be a limit towards telling thing even if it is a joke as unwarranted words will hurt people. I then recalled again this conversation with a friend of mine. This friend is at times quite cynical in words when having casual chat with people. I discussed with him one day on his behaviour and the response I got was equally amazing. He feels that everyone in this circle like to bitch people, if you don't know how to bitch people you will be the one to be doomed in no time. I was speechless.

We went on to divert the conversation topic to others. Ja mentioned B. Spontaneously, I jokingly blurted that Dan had to know this person. Mel was flushed. Ja's bf asked why. I couldn't stop myself at the time but to tell that B was Mel's date at one time. Dan immediately pretended angry at Mel and asked why didn't he know about B. Ja quickly put in a rescue jokingly accusing me of creating trouble for the two.

This was no doubt a small incidence, but I was a bit troubled as I made a blunder right after we discussed the wrong of An's behaviour.

No comments: